tuesday night.

when b came home, i was dizzy and slightly cross-eyed from trying to manage this week's schedule. i tried to explain how i felt...
me to b: i feel like i'm an administrative assistant in a large corporation or something. it's crazy.
b (without missing a beat): we are a large corporation.
well, that would explain why i feel that way then!
the funny thing is that when we decided to stop homeschooling this year, i truly thought it would be some sort of break for me. i expected a lull in the day and to feel capable in completing household chores. i imagined this beautiful world where i lovingly engaged my two little ones in the morning with educational games and then embraced my two older ones in the afternoon as i greeted them home from school with a big smile and warm cookies. :) do you see how i might have set myself up for a little disappointment? what i'm coming to realize is that life with four kids is busy. (actually, i think life as any sized family is busy.) when we homeschooled, our day was really hectic from first thing in the morning, until mid-afternoon. now, my busy times have reversed... it is really hectic from about noon until bedtime. but, i'm settling into the idea that this is my reality no matter what our educational choices. six schedules to maintain. six mouths to feed. five people that i want to love well. four little ones that i want to read to everyday. six people's laundry to do ALL THE TIME. four children that i want to give rich experiences to like music, art, sports, service, and clubs. it's full to say the least.
but, honestly, except when i'm pouting and complaining, i feel so happy and thankful to have this fullness. my heart overflows...
especially when i'm making "delicious" dinners for them...

when brian got home tonight, he took all the kids for a bike ride while i made dinner. nice. i always feel proud when i actually make dinner. of course, when i notice the family isn't really devouring it, the pride goes out the window. tonight, we had over-cooked turkey cutlets. (how do i avoid things like this?... they're just so darn thin!)
at the table...
oliver: this meat is so hard it's like it's 20 years old or something.
me: you still have to eat it. it helps make your teeth strong.
(this kid has serious meat issues. he's kept a piece of meat in his mouth for more than an hour before. so, needless to say, it helps when the meat is nice and tender.)
i think my new goal is going to teach the kids to cook really well so i can just delegate this responsibility!


keri said...

i laughed outload at oliver's comment about the meat. and his serious meat issues statement too! ella does the SAME thing!! although i think oliver has her beat with more than an hour!

btw, you are supermom.

jess said...

"twenty years old or something." hilarious.
oh kate! how i relate. i told jamie yesterday that i feel like every day comes apart at the seams-and i only have 2! i SO want love them graciously. i need jesus.

Angie Davis said...

did you wear your cute apron when you made dinner? :)
will we ever cease to have grandiose expectations about everything?
kids are finicky little things when it comes to food, regardless of how good or bad it is! If Oliver could surely be on a culinary path with a little help. I remember him telling me he didn't like how I cracked eggs, and showing me the "right" way.

Our Family of Five said...

Hey, I like that last idea! I hadn't thought of that one.... kids cooking, I can just delegate... NICE!

But as for this statement: "five people that i want to love well" ........... I so relate. Only, for me it's four not five. I have found myself at the end of the day recently wondering how I'm really doing in this area. I hope and pray its not how I 'FEEL' like I'm doing.

As for overcooked meat.... I always have a tendency to overcook it because I'm too paranoid about it being undercooked. :) My guys don't like it either.

Amanda said...

Turkey cutlets ARE hard not to overcook! I usually overcook them as well. Hey, at least they're fast!

Jean Joiner said...

man i was already tired before reading your blog...now i'm exhausted. thankful for God's grace. you are a wonderful mom! i love you. i laughed out loud at oliver's reaction to your dinner.