a very melancoly blog post that ends with a gift.

today i am thinking about heavier things.
so much is broken.
so many are sad.
 and at times it just feels so heavy.
(these kids~ triplets!!~ are the CUTEST and HAPPIEST kids...
but i just loved their pensive looks for this post)
(march/09: photo session in atlanta, ga)
don't get me wrong~
i'm still making mac&cheese,
still wiping bottoms,
still running to baseball games
still organizing playdates,
still planning birthday parties,
and still tucking sweet little faces into bed.
but heavy still lurks in the corners.

my mom fell, cut her head and had to get staples put in.
my brother had a seizure (he has type I diabetes).
my sister is struggling through her first trimester of sickness.
(don't worry, everybody is okay now.)
i miss my family and i want to be able to drive to see them.
to help them.
to scoop up my nephews and nieces and give their mamas and daddys a break.
(march 09: time with family)
 but i am here.
hoping to visit there soon...

and then beyond my family, so many of you have difficult situations.
there is so much that isn't the way it's supposed to be.
financial strain. sickness. loneliness. pain.
even my own heart doesn't function the way i want it to.
 but i believe in hope.
i have to.
a kind of hope that reminds us
that all that is broken,
will someday be restored.
 (march 09: photos by keri walker)
and that there is a possibility of redemption in even the darkest places of this world.
this is THE story i believe in.

but until then,
do you ever notice how in the midst of feeling heavy,
one little thing will happen that sort of just brightens things?
like maybe a new flower grows?
or someone brings you a coffee?
or you hear kids giggling in another room?
(summer 09: laurelhurst park, or)
or a friend says they're coming for a visit?
or you simply really connect with a song?

today, i want to do something lighthearted.
i'm wanting to give something to you.
possibly brighten your day.
by giving away one of my favorite things.

it is my gift to one of you:
Say I Am You

come on take it... come on take it...
take it from me... (heh)
the weepies: say i am you

it feels good to give something away.
all you need to do is leave a comment on this post.
tell me one of your favorite songs to sing while you're alone.
and leave your email address.
(also, if you have this album and would like hideaway instead, just say so.)

that's it.
something for almost nothing. ;)

(i forgot to add: one winner, randomly drawn, one entry per person,
and i'll let abigail draw the winner on monday 7 pacific time.)


Angie Davis said...

the early bird gets the worm?

love the pics!

i tend to find myself singing hymns throughout the day. i'm fine with that, but i really have been wanting to find other music...

thanks for the suggestion!

April Barber said...

love the pictures! i was actually thinking, "I wish K would post some pictures of her with the kids!"

i find myself singing "Great is thy Faithfulness" or "Jesus Loves Me" when my days are painful and hard. Maybe b/c that is what I sing to Chloe when I am rocking her to sleep on her really bad days?

much love to you!

Sarah said...

Your family is so beautiful. I just *love* looking at the pictures of you take because it gives me hope that I might one day have time to take more of my own!

My favorite song on a down day is "Heavenly Day" by Patty Griffin. In fact, I think you turned me on to her. There's just something wonderful about the promise of a beautiful day just around the corner.

BKicklighter said...

No lying? Right now I sing "Your Face! Your Face! No one has your face." ALL THE TIME. Just because my two year old is singing it all the time. It's catchy and I can't get it out of my head. When I focus I sing "There is a Higher Throne" - I love the line, "The Lamb becomes their Shepherd King. . ." sigh.

I LOVE reading your blog.

Stacey said...

I tend to sing Gimme or I'm Not Alone, by Widespread Panic. I don't know this band you're giving away, but saw your post the other day. Hope your mom and brother are feeling better. Hugs!!

Kari said...

My new fav song to sing in the car is "Girl Named Tennessee" by needtobreathe.

Elizabeth Dark Wiley said...

Lately Patty Griffin's Downtown Church has been doing the trick.

I'll add that Sigur Ros, specifically the one below, will given me the much needed kick in the pants, to take a deep breath, jump up, and get into the day:

And don't put me in the drawing, I've already got all the weepies (so cool am I, right?) Wonderful idea, though. Someone will be very fortunate to receive your gift.

Jenny Jones said...

For some reason like since forever ago I love singing Sarah McLachlan's Ice Cream...just love it!!

Jean Joiner said...

great post, kate...i can't think of a song at the moment. maybe i'll enter one later...but sisters probably shouldn't win anyways. :) also, fyi, our brother has type 1 diabetes, not type 2.

Scott said...

Oh, so I sing "Who Loves the Sun" by the Velvet Underground because it's this goofy little lost love song by the coolest band ever (this is not an opinion, but a fact proven by science and scientists). Also, I have all the Weepies but I still want to win because then I can give the CDs to somebody and then I'LL look like the awesome person giving the gift of music from on high to a deserving soul and they'll be all like "Thank you, Scott. You're such a generous thoughtful person." And then I'll smile shyly so that it seems like I do this sort of thing so often that it's second nature to be so wonderful but it's pleasant to be recognized for my good deeds.

Also, blogger wants me to type the word "inoril" in order to post, but I don't think it's even a word. I'm going to look up "inoril" anyway, so I may learn something. Your blog is like some sort of P90X workout FOR MY MIND.


SardineInk said...

i keep getting songs that we sing to N stuck in my head. this morning it was Jesus Loves Me...that ones OK! I think we have say i am you but am not sure about hideaway. SO looking forward to seeing you soon! sweet post!

jessica burns said...

first, a confession: i totally creep facebook and your blog.

i love reading what you write! and i especially loved this post...there are days when what i call 'melancolic madness" strikes. it's like the heaviness of the world calls us for a moment to just sit and ache. and crave for jesus to return...the kind of day when you just need someone to remind you of the bigger story. sigh. as the weepies would say; even the the stars sometimes fade to gray.

longing with you in orlando (and hoping you get a taste of the true and bigger story at the end of melancholic madness),

Katt Taylor said...

This post almost made me cry. It reminded me of the pain in the world and in my life. The worries and cares that get you down. The most imminent is my father is having heart surgery on Thursday. I'm confident of the outcome but I'm worried for him.
The pictures always made me smile before the tears came.
Your children are so beautiful.

The song I sing when I'm alone is "Dream a Little Dream of Me" by the Mamas and the Papas.

Meg said...

So, I am crying now. Your blog always does that to me-in a good, touch the heart way! I can TOTALLY relate to everything you are saying and the little thing that held back the tears for me today was Kohan's hugs and his " I love you Mama". Your pictures are beautiful, as usual. As far as a song goes, the Indigo Girls have my sing alone songs, "Closer to Fine", "Galileo" or "Ghost" are favorites for showers and road trips.

peggyc said...

today i had "i will sing of my redeemer" (the old hymn) in mind! i love your honesty and your heart, katie. so thankful for you!!!

Alexis said...

Great post and great pictures! I think I could answer this many different ways depending on the day. But today: Omaha by Counting Crows...

Claudine said...

"OK is alright with me" by Eric Hutchinson....sing it all the time on the way to work..and loud. Reminds me that although I'm going to see a ton of ugly during the day..."ok is alright with me!".....love your pics. Sorry to hear about your mom and Andy:( My mom is in Washington and I know how hard it is to be far from family. Love your pictures!

Susie said...

It's sad, but the only song that comes to mind is "I'm a hungry, hungry herbivore" from Dinosaur Train. My kids have taken over my life!! Yet, in the midst of a very HEAVY week (oh, how I resonate with your thoughts!) the bright spot was watching my kids run through the sprinklers in our yard today. They would scream, "It's a miracle" every time they would see a rainbow, kind of joking. But it's kind of true!

keri said...

evan and i have been jammin to michael franti & spearhead's "Say Hey (I love you)". i love hearing him sing it. :)
and i'm diggin the weepies, started hearing their stuff a few months ago on pandora.
and i'm diggin your post. cuz i love you, i love you, i love you (i'm singing the song! have you heard it?)

Laura said...

Lots of songs go through my head...
Patty Griffin "Forgiveness", "Holy, Holy, Holy," and Cyndi Lauper...(I'm a closet fan).

MLS said...

I love to sing "He's Always Been Faithful" by Sara Groves and "You are Good" by Nichole Nordeman


amy said...

anything christy nockels sings picks up my heart. and like many have said before...i love reading what you share. speaks to my heart. (and as a funny note, my word verification is "sangly")

Miss Mommy said...

Your post really touched me. I had a rough day after a rather rough week. There's nothing like hearing someone voice your thoughts/ feelings like they were right there the whole time.

Fav song: definitely By My Side by Ben Harper. It was our wedding dance song and I always feel better after I sing it. :)


Lori said...

Hard days, some days. But your Elliot sure makes me smile as I read your posts. Delicious! So glad I got a taste of his personality.:)

Come thou Fount of every blessing, tune my heart to sing Thy grace. Streams of mercy never ceasing call for songs of loudest praise...

Or in the kitchen alone with dishes or cooking, any of M. Ward's music.

Brian said...

"The Black Hawk War, or, How to Demolish an Entire Civilization and Still Feel Good About Yourself in the Morning, or, We Apologize for the Inconvenience but You're Going to Have to Leave Now, or, 'I Have Fought the Big Knives and Will Continue to Fight Them Until They Are Off Our Lands!'" by Sufjan Stevens

Katie said...

Katie, How fun to find your blog!
And to be introduced to the Weepies:)
Sometimes I feel like I live under a rock or two!
I am an instrumental (piano/violin) girl ...of music from any genre.

Hope you guys are well.
Katie Garrett

April Brown said...

I'm so embarrassed to say what i've been listening to (and singing throughout the day) since so many have said hymns! But, I get stuck on Gold Digger by Kanye West because I run to it in the mornings...sad and depraved, i know ;)

Also loved your thoughts...thanks for sharing!!

MaryMartha said...

When everything is going wrong...its Alanis Morsette...I'm a WITCH (incase kids read your blog), I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, i'm a saint....LOVE THAT ONE SONG REAL LOUD!
I've liked that one since high school :)
Getting through "life junk" and getting things back in perspective..."In christ Alone"
And my kids love, "He's got the whole world"...its a fav. It's amazing how something so simple can minster to me :)